Aardvark Avarice

20 They Can't All Be Winners

Welcome to Aardvark Avarice, a podcast of Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy. It's true they can't all be winners. Dame Judi Dench and Sir Ian McKellen have won ever award under the sun, Idris Alba is liquid awesome, and Taylor Swift is - well, Taylor Swift. Yet, they all appeared in the movie Cats. Yeesh. My own crap show was a play called Sticky Buns. Don't judge me too harshly.

19 Aliens Among Us (Part 2)

This is part two and the conclusion of "Aliens Among Us". Will Tamara escape the unrelenting advances of Dan the finance man or will her alien capturer keep her imprisoned until she gives in to its demands - one box of chocolate covered peanuts. Sometimes, aliens just suck. Enjoy!

18 Aliens Among Us (Part 1)

On a sunny day in Central Park smarmy finance guy Dan attempts to chat up the attractive Tamara, but she's not making it easy. Neither is her little secret. It's alien related if you couldn't tell from the title. Aardvark Avarice presents the fiction story "Aliens Among Us". This is part one of a two-part series. Enjoy.

17 The Post-Game Show

Welcome to Aardvark Avarice, a podcast of Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy.
The following is a sketch comedy presentation of a North American Football League post-game show. On field reporter Tugger Macdonald interviews players from the winning team, the Gridiron Goons. Enjoy!
1:35 - Connor "Hondo" Tate
7:05 - Dade Kimble
9:43 - Busby Fienes

16 The Clooney

Welcome to Aardvark Avarice, a podcast of Nerd Humor and Geek Comedy.  I just want to say that the mall is where men’s hairstyles go to die. Over a decade ago I made the mistake of getting a haircut at the mall and I've suffered the trauma ever since. Only now do I feel comfortable telling my story. My hope is that others can learn from my experience and avoid the tragedy that befell me. Enjoy!

15 A Recommendation from Chewbacca

In this podcast I present letters of recommendation from an ROTC Seargeant, Bill Gates, and the big fuzzball himself, Chewbacca. With corresponding voices, of course.
Yes, somewhere in the great slush pile ether, these letters accompanied very fictional resumes and cover letters I wrote to apply for very real jobs. Taxidermist. Pallbearer. CIA Agent. This was one outlet I used to stem off boredom. Now I just do a podcast.
ROTC Seargeant: 3:23
Bill Gates: 6:00
Chewbacca: 8:20

14 Garbage Plate #3

If you’ve listened before you know I like to do an occasional episode I call a garbage plate, where I throw together all the ideas that couldn’t fill out a whole episode on their own. This is garbage plate #3 where I discuss things like sneezes, Batman, Val Kilmer, Val Kilmer as Batman, motorboating (the naughty kind),  Yo Mama, and my personal Maple Taffy Conspiracy. Enjoy!

13 Nondescript White Van

I saw a nondescript white van sitting in front of my office building. Nothing ever good stepped out of a nondescript white van, and nothing ever safe and wholesome happened in a nondescript white van.

Christmas Special: A Very Connery Christmas

For your pleasure, we here at the Aardvark have unearthed a lost recording of the late Sean Connery, God rest his soul. Harking back to his days as Darby O’Gill he gives us his rendition of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer… while showering. Enjoy.

12 Unusual Wiki Sports Articles

Ah, Wiki, ever the giver of miscellaneous information and filler content for high school research papers. This podcast looks at those unusual Wiki articles devoted to sports, and not just because I’m looking for a filler podcast. I really wanted to do the voices of two eels talking about the sport Conger Cuddling. Who wouldn't. Enjoy.